Readings notes
 
 
Children's Emotions
 
     
 
Sophie Bouchard
  
 
sophie.bouchard@mail.mcgill.ca
  
 
 
 
 

 
 

"The stories people tell have a way of taking care of them. If stories come to you, care for them and learn to give them away where they are needed. Sometimes a person needs a story more than food to stay alive. That is why we put these stories in each other's memory. That is how people care for themselves."

─Beyond the Innocence of Childhood:
Helping Children and Adolescent Cope With
Life-Threatening Illness and Dying, (p. 42)

Children's Emotions when faced with Life-Threatening Illness

From Beyond the Innocence of Childhood: Helping Children and Adolescent Cope With Life-Threatening Illness and Dying

When a young person faces a life-threatening illness, it has an inpact on every aspect of that young person's life. Children are filled with numerous emotions, when they are sick, such as:

Helplessness, loneliness, anger, sadness, guilt, fear, culpability, anxiety...

"Children frequently lack the life experiences and cognitive capability to understand suffreing. They must rely on parents and other adults to interpret its meaning and help them to deal with it." (p. 151)

"Children often cannot find a way to express those thoughts or feelings. They may not be able to find the words, or they may simply feel too overwhelmed to even try to communicate." (p. 9)

Ways of helping children to communicate their feelings:

  • Art work (drawings, crafts
  • Story and Active Imagination
  • Music therapy
  • Play (indoor and outdoor)
  • Humour and laughter
  • The love of a family pet

"It is often through their writing, poetry, and participation in camps or group programs that children and teens help each other." (p. 169)

Richard, age nineteen is a long-term survivor of a pelvic tumor, says to other young people with cancer:

"... the hope that lies at the end of it all. This experience, the strength that you gain from having beaten one of the worst diseases known to us, can help you change your life, realize how precious each day is, and live life to the fullest." (p. 169)

 

From Beyond the Innocence of Childhood: Factors Influencing Children and Adolescents' Perceptions and Attitudes Toward Death

"Nature constantly renews itself. It's the same for people. Living and dying are part of human unfolding." (p.9)

However, we are never prepared to the eventuality of a child's death, because nobody could suspects it. Old people are expected to die, nevertheless it brings a lot of sadness, pain and a feeling of loss. When life is taken from a child, it is terriblely difficult to accept and understand.

Children should not be discouraged from crying and expressing its emotions:

"Crying is a natural emotion. A newborn enters life crying for more oxygen. In early life, tears are an infant's means of expressing needs, pains, and discomforts. Even after children are able to verbalize their desires, they continue to weep in order to release painful emotions. [...] Tears are wordless messages, a vital part of grieving for people of all ages." (p.11)

 

From Handbook of Childhood Death and Bereavement

This diagram shows how anxiety is a constant part of life-threatening illness, with "up and down". (p.91)